May 6Minority Languages in the Coronation, and why they matterToday, King Charles III will be crowned in Westminster Abbey, in a ceremony that has changed shockingly little in the past thousand or more years. For most people, both in Britain and around the world, the most impressive thing about it is how archaic the whole affair is. With the…Linguistics5 min readLinguistics5 min read
Apr 27How Many Languages Does ChatGPT Speak?I was recently languishing on an 11-hour flight from Istanbul to Boston, and decided to watch a science fiction movie called Prometheus. It opens with a cyborg learning Proto-Indo-European, the common ancestor of all the languages of Europe, Iran, and north India. …Linguistics6 min readLinguistics6 min read
Feb 5Do People from Iran Speak Farsi, or Persian?If you want to visit Iran, which language should you brush up on? It is a more complicated question for Iran than for other countries. But now is really not the best time to go there anyway, so we have plenty of time to figure it out. Universities in the…Linguistics5 min readLinguistics5 min read
Jan 16How Does a Country with Four Languages Function?Modern democracy can be a complicated, controversial, and even chaotic business. But in a world of convoluted constitutions and contested elections, there is one country that still does things the old way. When the Swiss need to decide on something, they go to the town square, hear speeches, and vote…Linguistics6 min readLinguistics6 min read
Jan 5What Was Old English Like? Part II: War and Grammar (and Gender)A cataclysmic barbarian invasion can change a man’s habits. Left alone, languages tend not to change much. But prolonged political disorder, heavy (especially hostile) engagement with foreigners, and low literacy can catalyse radical shifts. In the late Middle Ages, all three of these befell England like a torrent. …Linguistics7 min readLinguistics7 min read
Dec 31, 2022What Was Old English Like? Part I: Blithering with BeowulfHwæt! We Gardena in geardagum, þeodcyninga, þrym gefrunon, hu ða æþelingas ellen fremedon. Faced with a line in French, Spanish, or German, discerning English speakers can at least recognise a few words. Even farther-flung tongues like Russian or Japanese have some familiar tidbits sprinkled in. …Linguistics4 min readLinguistics4 min read
Dec 27, 2022A Merry Christmas, or a Happy One?On Sunday, for the first time since 1951, people in the United Kingdom and around the world tuned in to hear someone other than Queen Elizabeth wish us all glad tidings. …Linguistics4 min readLinguistics4 min read
Nov 25, 2022A Quick F***ing Survey of Swearing Around the WorldTrigger warning: I generally try to use polite language, but I am comprehensively relaxing that standard here, for obvious reasons. “When the British Empire finally sinks beneath the waves of history, it will leave behind it only two memorials: one is the game of Association Football, and the other is…Linguistics6 min readLinguistics6 min read
Nov 24, 2022How Do You Pronounce “Qatar?” (or any other country, for that matter)Of all the controversies about this year’s World Cup, perhaps none is so conversationally ubiquitous as how we in the English-speaking world are supposed to pronounce the name of the country where it is being played. Traditionally, it has been something like “ka-TAHR.” This version has been mainstream in European…Linguistics5 min readLinguistics5 min read
Oct 11, 2022Quid Pro What?: The Unique and Consequential Language of LawThe first impeachment trial US President Donald Trump hinged largely on whether he held out military aid to Ukraine as a bargaining chip to get his counterpart Volodymyr Zelensky to investigate the son of his rival Joe Biden. In other words, was he offering a quid pro quo? …Linguistics4 min readLinguistics4 min read
